Actions Speak Louder than Words (a poem)

I love you, he said,

But forgot about my piano recital.

You’re important to me, he said,

But didn’t listen when I told him I was getting bullied.

I love you, he said,

But complained about paying for my braces.

You’re important to me, he said,

But was too busy to spend time with me.

I love you, he said,

But didn’t care that my car was breaking down.

You’re important to me, he said,

But the next day he was silent and angry.

I love you, he said,

But never heard me cry myself to sleep.

You’re important to me, he said,

But begrudged helping me with a project.

I love you, he said,

And I thought, No you don’t.

You’re important to me, he said,

And I thought, No I’m not.

Poet’s note: I wrote this as a young adult trying to understand how my dad could say one thing to me and yet treat me in a way that negated those words. All my life I struggled with feeling worthless and “not enough” and it took me many years to see how this all tied back to the way that his actions towards me never lined up with how he said he felt about me.