Marguerite d’Youville was born in 1701 in Quebec, Canada. She endured poverty, an abusive marriage, the loss of four of her six children, and the rejection of her community. Despite this, Marguerite poured herself into helping the poor in her community and running the local hospital. She founded the religious order now known as the Grey Nuns.
As a Catholic woman who has also suffered an abusive marriage, I find Marguerite’s story inspiring. Despite everything she endured, she never became angry, bitter, or hateful. Rather, the sorrows in her life gave her the empathy and compassion to reach out to others suffering similar sorrows. This deep desire to spread love to those who are hurting as we have been hurt is the foundation of maggieyouville.com.
Backstory: Life in Quebec in 1700
Quebec was “discovered” by a French explorer in 1534 and founded as a town in 1608, just a century before Marguerite’s birth. Most of the people there were French Catholic immigrants. The winters were cold and long compared to France, and the settlers lacked many of the comforts of the old country.
Politically, New France was affected by conflict between Great Britain and France. Colonies and lands were traded back and forth between the two countries during Marguerite’s lifetime. Quebec also relied on maintaining good relations with the surrounding First Nations people, some of whom were allied with the French and others were likely to attack.
By Marguerite’s day, Quebec was the French capital of New France, controlling trade in the area. The town was divided into two sections: the lower town was the merchants located close to the river while the upper town boasted the governor’s residence as well as the Ursuline Convent and Jesuit College.
The population of Quebec was around 9,000 people. Most were farmers, trying to clear the land and grow food. Many were involved in the fur trade, either legally or illegally. Men still outnumbered women, despite the efforts of the colony governor to encourage women (the “king’s daughters” or “filles du roi”) to immigrate to New France to be wives to the settlers and farmers there.
While society was paternalistic, extreme circumstances sometimes allowed women to shine in ways they couldn’t in France. The Canada History Project notes that “When the men died, the widows sometimes took over their businesses and managed them so well that at one time, in the mid-eighteenth century, some of the biggest entrepreneurs in Quebec City and Montreal were women. Marie-Anne Barbel, for instance, presided over a fur trading business, a pottery works and large real estate holdings.”
Marguerite’s Childhood
Marguerite was born in a small town just outside of Quebec. Her father was a military officer from a good French family and her mother was the daughter of the governor. Marguerite’s uncle was the famous Canadian explorer Pierre de la Vérendrye. She was the oldest of six children, but her father died when she was only seven years old.
Her father’s death left Marguerite’s family in poverty. Her mother didn’t begin receiving her widow’s pension for another six years. She was left to raise six children without an income. Marguerite would have helped take care of her siblings (young and close to her in age) as well as do household chores and likely try to help garden and farm as well.
At age ten, thanks to her great-grandfather’s help, she was able to go to school at the Ursuline Convent in Quebec. She completed two years of study there and then returned home to help teach her younger siblings.
Marguerite’s Marriage
Marguerite was twenty-one when she married a local trader, François d’Youville. He was an alcoholic gambler and often absent, trading illegal liquor to the local First Nations. Marguerite lived with his mother, who treated her terribly. Over the next eight years, she gave birth to six babies, but four died in infancy.
In 1727, Marguerite’s religious devotion increased. Perhaps this was when she experienced a revelation of God’s personal love for her that continued to motivate her for the rest of her life. Her son noticed that she began “to renounce vain adornments and to embrace the way of piety.” She also began to explore different religious sisterhoods.
Soon after this, her mother-in-law died, leaving her and Francois well off. However, Francois then fell ill and, despite how he’d treated her during their marriage, Marguerite cared for him gently until his death in 1730. On his death, he left her with so many debts that she had to renounce most of her property, keeping only the home in which she lived.
Now a widow with two young sons, Marguerite ran a store out of her home. She was a successful businesswoman. However, her heart was drawn to the poor of Quebec. She visited the impoverished, sick, and prisoners and even begged for money to bury criminals who had died.
In 1737, after her first son entered the Jesuit seminary, she and three friends took private vows to the service of the poor. While they continued to live a secular life, they maintained a religious attitude. These women rented a home in Quebec to offer hospitality to women in need.
Instead of being appreciated for helping those around her, Marguerite was scorned for her efforts. She was accused of being drunk and illegally selling liquor, as her husband had done. Other people called her a prostitute. Despite being shunned and scorned, Marguerite carried on with her work.
The Grey Nuns
In 1747, the local hospital was in massive disrepair. The governors asked Marguerite to take over its administration. Once again, her business skills came in handy as she helped the hospital pay off its debts and found businesses to support itself. Although the people began to recognize and appreciate Marguerite’s work, she still faced political and financial challenges to establishing her order and running the hospital.
In 1753, King Louis XV confirmed her as the hospital’s director and authorized her to form a religious community there, which was confirmed two years later by the local bishop.
The Sisters of Charity of Montreal became known as the Grey Nuns because of their habit and the General Hospital became known as the Hotel Dieu. A proverb arose in the area: “Go to the Grey Nuns; they never refuse to serve.” The Hotel Dieu took in anyone, including lepers and epileptics, battered women, abandoned children, and sick priests. In 1755, they cared for those stricken during a smallpox epidemic. In the war of 1760, they also took in prisoners and wounded soldiers from both sides of the conflict.
Despite her success with the hospital, Marguerite’s personal trials weren’t over. She suffered from a bad knee that left her bedridden for months. Other health concerns plagued her. Then in 1765, the Hotel Dieu burned to the ground. Marguerite knelt in the ashes and sang the Te Deum, then began the process of raising money and rebuilding again.
She died in 1771 after two attacks of paralysis. She was canonized in 1990 by Pope Saint John Paul II, who called the “Mother of Universal Charity.” St. Marguerite d’Youville is the patron saint of widows, difficult marriages, and the death of young children. Her feast day is celebrated on October 16.
What We Can Learn from St. Marguerite
As Franscisan Media notes, “Saints deal with plenty of discouragement, plenty of reasons to say, ‘Life isn’t fair’ and wonder where God is in the rubble of their lives. We honor saints like Marguerite because they show us that with God’s grace and our cooperation, suffering can lead to compassion rather than bitterness.”
While Marguerite’s sisters were always caring for those around them, she made sure they knew to meet their own needs too. The CCCB says, “Marguerite asked each of her Sisters ‘to make known her needs, without hiding her infirmities, and not to undertake anything that would damage her health.’” As single moms or moms living with abuse, we also need to be honest about our needs (and to ask for help), and to take care of our own health so that we can take care of our children.
In one letter to a friend, Marguerite wrote, “My dear Father, pray that God will give me the strength to bear all these crosses and to make saintly use of them.” Like St. Marguerite, many of us who face abusive situations also deal with ill health, scorn and scandal, and other struggles. The weight of these at times can feel like too much–one problem would be more than enough to deal with, and yet we face multiple problems. At times like this, we can turn to our heavenly Father while also asking our community for help.
Her biographer Claudette Laucelle concludes that “the indomitable courage which enabled her to stand up to her many trials, to defend herself against the unfair accusations of those in power in Canada, and to put up with the insults and calumnies of the populace, should not obscure the sensitivity of this woman, who was moved by the misfortunes as well as by the moments of happiness of her relatives and friends and whom every form of human affliction touched deeply.” We can ask St. Marguerite to pray that we will have courage like hers to face our own trials and also be moved by the misfortunes of those around us.
The Vatican website explains, “Marguerite d’Youville can sympathize with the unfortunate and painful situation of so many orphans, with adolescents worried about the future, with disillusioned girls who live without hope, with married women suffering from unrequited love and with single parents. But most especially, Marguerite is a kindred spirit with all who have given their lives to helping others.” To this list, I would add that she can sympathize with those of us who are dealing with husbands struggling with addictions, husbands who are absent, and husbands who are abusive.
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